Coaching is a soft skill but not for "softies"

Coaching is simple but it is hard to learn. There is a perception in many people, that coaching is something to treat people nicely, speak warmly with them and move them carefully to do better at whatsoever there might be. This is regarded by many, especially managers, as time consuming and not really dealing with the problems, just postponing them.

Coaching is about facilitating people to think and making people move and act and it is about setting targets, doing a reality check, let the staff discuss what alternatives he has to get to his target and then get into action. With a plan, time scaled and measurable in terms of results and reviews at certain times about any progress. What is soft about that? Nothing. It is just a structured way of thinking and doing and learning.

Rather than consuming time this method allows both parties to think clear and fast, check what is needed and free the manager from thinking on behalf of his report. This, after both have gotten used to this process, will save a lot of time. It needs discipline to go through these coaching sessions, to review fairly and strictly but the staff thereafter is committed, not defensive and feels accountable. Once that status has been reached, coaching is a way of creative thinking, effective acting and learning.

What this process needs though is trust and empathy. And empathy does not at all mean feeling pity with the staff, it just means to take him serious, respect her and look at that person as a human being with talent, needs, feelings, strengths and weaknesses.

Now, coaching also opens a very good way into finding out what the peoples’ strengths and weaknesses are. Because only when people open up and are motivated to freely talk and discuss working issues will a manger be able to find out, what these people are really good at, what they like and what they are having the potential for. Too many times the talents of people are hidden by fear, keeping quiet and finding nobody supporting their disclosure and discovery.

It takes two to tango and there is no working relationship without interaction. And interaction always requires at least two people. One of them is the manager, the other the employee. If one is not up to his or her responsibility, then things go wrong.
When it comes to communication, when it comes to motivation, when it comes to performance management, coaching always leads the way to improvement. So, rather than saying coaching is for softies, you better say, coaching is for tough managers with the eminent will to proceed, perform and bringing results. It’s tough for staff as well because they have to release and use a lot more of their IQ & EQ energy, creativity and responsibility.

Coaching sets this energy free, that is the point. And you get this additional energy for the price of learning and practicing a tough method - coaching. What looks so easy, flowing and going is a hard learned skill - when it is done correctly and masterfully. But the return on investment is big. The ultimate target of coaching is results, nothing but that. Isn't this tough enough?